Friday, December 31, 2010

Required Surfing: Spirituality and Practice

A friend just recently brought this website to my attention and i liked it so much that I wanted to write about it. while it is not directly about synchronicities, it is about creating spritual practices in everyday living.

I especially like the quotations and the mantras for different spiritual practices like silence, transformation, presence, hope....

Additionally the website is easy to navigate and not ad intrusive. It is my new daily favorite (yes.... I like it THAT much).

and If you like my blog you will love this website.

Mirror synchronicity: i was just thinking of you!

A type of mirror synchronicity that happens frequently to many people is to call someone and hear them exclaim "I was just going to call you!" or "I was just thinking about you." For the caller the synchronicity is not easily seen....we have to take their word that they were in fact just thinking of us. Last May when i had heightened sense of awareness and sensitivity to the universe and its Power, i saw every interaction as an intentional Communication in the right time at the right place with the right people. Somewhere along the way i had lost that assured feeling that things are the way they are supposed to be. Now, in the last several days I have returned to my belief in the purposive nature of the small coincidences. I have been attempting meditation more frequently which may have led to my feelings of connectedness. In the past two days i have heard 3 times the declaration that i called at just that time when the other was thinking of me. I don't think of it as any special skill on my part but rather maybe a small sign that I am now realigning with the universe. I hope.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Directional Synchronicity: God opens a window

I started a new job 4 weeks ago at a hospice. It is fast paced and somewhat intense but I love it. Another social worker started the same day I did and then just gave notice last Monday, just three weeks into the job. She first called off sick and then came in and dropped off all of her stuff. I was disappointed and surprised that she didn't stick it out longer, but she had to do what was right for her.

When I talked to her the next day, she told me that when she had gotten back home from dropping off her badge she checked her email and there was an interview request waiting for her in her inbox! This was a job she had applied for over 6 weeks before... and now they called her! We laughed at that old adage - "God never closes a door without opening a window." I bet she got the job.

Mirror Coincidence: Dream On

Saturday morning - I'm Christmas shopping on the internet and my husband is playing with his new speakers. I found a pajama set for my niece that had the lyrics to "Dream On" printed on them. Since she really likes classic rock, I thought I would buy them for her but I wanted to make sure I wasn't sending her inappropriate lyrics. I looked up the words to the song and then was asking my husband if he owned it so I could hear it because I couldn't remember the song (Aerosmith, if you're curious). Well, I was satisfied with what I saw on the printed lyrics and I was checking out of the website when the "Dream On" song came on over the speakers. I asked my husband if he had downloaded it for me and he said no - he was listening to Pandora and it just came on!

Tuesday, November 09, 2010

Directional Synchronicity: Timing is everything

I graduated with my MSW in June and had been looking all summer for a full time job. It seemed as if I was never going to find one. I knew God had a reason but I wasn't sure what it was...

Then I found my dream house which would require a lot of contractors and an architect (the dream house had a big hole in the roof). I told myself that I wasn't able to find a full time job because I needed to be part time to work with the vendors.

Well, the strangest thing happened. Two days before we were supposed to close on the house, the financing fell through (because of the hole). That is the SAME day that I got a job offer for a full time job.

Had I gotten the job and the house, I would've been a wreck. I wouldn't have had time to work on the house and also the job was on the other side of town from where the house was.

Had I lost both the house and the job, I would've been a wreck. I would still be wondering why, when I finally found my life's purpose, I wasn't able to fulfill my promise.

But now I have the job and not the house and in hindsight, I think that's they way it was supposed to play out all along.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Recommended Reading: Many Lives, Many Masters

I had heard of and owned this book for several years but since I am a compulsive book buyer, I own several books that I have not read. At an acquaintance's suggestion, I finally picked this book up and I finished it in a day. At the risk of sounding dramatic, it has changed the way I view the world. I already had believed in reincarnation and had read several books on Karma, but none affected me so much as this one. The day after I read the book I was directed to a questionable neighborhood for a meeting about holding support groups. My gut reaction was fear. I didn't want to put myself in an environment that might be dangerous. Unfortunately, that kind of reaction keeps the under-served population from getting what they need. Thinking of the book and how we are all in this spiritual journey together, I started seeing the place in a new light. I felt that I was supposed to be there and that the lesson was as much for me as it was for the people I was to help. We have three support groups scheduled!

Mirror Synchronicity: Merged families

My friend Lisa's daughter has 2 Aunt Amys, 2 Uncle Marks and 2 Uncle Brads. In addition, Lisa has a sister-in-law named Lisa as well.

Now it's not unusual to have some name repetition within families that marry but this seems beyond coincidence.

I told Lisa about this post and she replied:

"You could add that both Mark's and both Lisa's have the same middle names (Mark Alan and Lisa Ann), plus that one Amy's maiden last name is the same as the other Amy's married last name. It really is creepy!"

Mirror Coincidence: Phone calls

Last May when I had all sorts of metaphysical phenomenon happen to me, I realized that interruptions are sometimes not coincidences and it's the universe's way of changing direction. I was on the phone with my friend Janice and at the same time I had another call beep in on that phone and my work cell phone started ringing. I took that as a sign that Janice and I had to wrap up our conversation so that she could focus on the things that she needed to get done that day.

Mirror Synchronicity: Due Amici

Janice is a friend of mine who I've known for fifteen years. She and I have drifted in and out of each others lives over the years as we've changed jobs, residences and spouses. I saw her on my birthday in May and we were so excited to reconnect that we vowed to see each other again soon. Summer came and went and somehow it just never seemed to work. She invited me to her husband's 50th birthday party at a restaurant. Unfortunately, I had to decline because I had a rehearsal dinner for a wedding that evening. I was so disappointed in the timing of it all.

Well, if you read my blog, you know where this is going. Since I had declined the invitation to the birthday party, I had forgotten about where it was to be hosted. The day before the dinner, Janice left me a Facebook message about getting back in touch. I called her immediately to see if she could get together but she was busy planning the party at Due Amici. Suddenly I made the connection that the rehearsal dinner was at the same place. Both events were at the same restaurant on the same day at the same time! While I wasn't able to be fully present at the party, I was able to visit some with Janice after all.

What is even better is that the translation of the restaurant name is "Two friends"!

Thursday, July 01, 2010

Channeling Erik

Recently this blog was brought to my attention. I found it so interesting and so insightful, I thought I would blog about it myself rather than just put it up in the links. The blogger has taken the awful awful experience of losing her son to suicide and turned the experience into a healing exploration of the afterlife.

Mirror Coincidence: 22:22

So this is really weird, but two nights in a row I happened to look at the clock (military time) at 10:22. Is 22:22 double the 11:11? It's a new number combo for me.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Mirror Synchronicity: Lois Lane

We were visiting Long Island near BethPage and driving back to our hotel after lunch via a new route when we passed Frankie Lane. My husband thought it was hilarious to have a street name with that name but I didn't know who Frankie Lane was, so it wasn't significant to me.

Then I said I thought it would be cool if there was a Lois Lane - the fictional character from the Superman comics/movies...and sure enough about a second later, we passed Lois Lane.

Mirror Synchronicity: Stayin Alive

My husband and I were having lunch at the Silver Dinner in the Baltimore airport for the first time. I was looking at the jukebox on the table with a collection of 180 'oldies' from the past four decades that anyone could select from their table and it would play over the speakers in the restaurant. Of course since anyone could select a song, the likelihood of the queue working through while you were still eating was slip. I said I would really like to hear 'Stayin Alive' by the Bee Gees. Not 5 seconds later, that was the very next song that started playing.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Mirror Synchronicity: Cemetery

This is really two synchronicities in one, which I love!

My friend Janna flew in tonight from Chicago to attend the Association for Gravestone Studies (AGS) conference. I had met Janna at the death education conference and had kept in touch but I do not know her well. I mention this because when Janna decided to attend this conference in my hometown, I offered to pick her up from the airport and it was important to me to not be late. Her flight got in at 9:50 p.m.

I had a really long day so I decided to lay down for a nap at 7:00 p.m. thinking I would sleep for about an hour. I woke up when my phone rang at 9:35. It was the exact amount of time I needed to get to the airport. In a panic, I answered the phone call from my dad and quickly told him I didn't have time to talk and I would call him back in a little while.

Thanks to my dad's phone call which woke me up, I managed to make it to the airport in a reasonable amount of time. While I was driving Janna to the conference location, my dad called again. Not wanting to be rude to Janna, I didn't pick up the phone.

Once I dropped off Janna, I saw that my dad had called after 11:00, which is quite late for him. I realized he must really want to talk to me. When I called him back the urgent question was:

I'm at the family reunion and I need to know tonight, do you want to be buried in the family plot?

He apologized for such an on-the-spot morbid question, but I had to laugh, since I had just had a long conversation during the drive with Janna about death and dying and memorials before I dropped her off at a conference about cemetery inscriptions!

So really, there were two synchronicities here - the timing of the phone call (Directional synchronicity telling me to get up and get going) and also the subject of the phone call coinciding with the purpose for me ignoring the phone call (Mirror synchronicity about cemeteries and memorializing the dead).

Communicating without saying a word

Last week a new friend of mine, K., mentioned that she has had multiple psychics tell her that they were receiving contact from K.'s grandmother. What disturbed K. was that her grandmother had not yet died. She has dementia. Three days later K. and I were both at a séance where the person sitting next to K. told her that her grandmother was right there and had a message for K. but would only give it to K. directly. This is very frustrating for K. because while she is a healer, and she can also sense spirit, she has not previously had success with receiving auditory messages.

After the séance, I mentioned to K. that my aunt who had Alzheimer's was sending me messages before she had passed. I suggested perhaps there was unfinished business that her grandmother needed to resolve. K. acknowledged that there was and she said that her mother and her aunt were not getting along. I asked if K. was in the position to help mend that relationship, and she confirmed that she was.

In thinking about this experience and about signs in general, I realized that not all messages need to be auditory. I have had a strong desire to receive auditory messages, but when I review my blog history, I know I have been receiving the love and guidance loud and clear without anyone ever saying a word.

Directional Synchronicity: Dragonfly

Ok first of all, I have to say, I hate bugs. Almost to the point where I possibly have a phobia. So to see a HUGE dragonfly on my porch step brought a range of emotions in a very short time period. I was repulsed at first because it was HUGE and it's a BUG, but then, it didn't move when I approached it and I thought it was kind of peaceful. Hmmm... maybe it's good luck? Or maybe it's just a bug that landed on my porch. I thought about it for a bit and then went about my day.

I went out for another errand and when I came back, either the same dragonfly or a different one was on my porch again in a slightly different spot. OK, this cannot be a coincidence, I thought. You might say it was a coincidence, but considering that I am now over 40 and cannot recall ever seeing a dragonfly close-up before and suddenly twice in one day? On my porch where I can't miss it? Enough to blog for sure. So what does it mean? Well a quick Google search indicates that different cultures ascribe different meanings to the symbol of the dragonfly. The comment that I found on to resonate the most for me was this:

"And as a dragonfly lives a short life, it knows it must live its life to the fullest with the short time it has – which is a lesson for all of us. "

This is especially meaningful for me because of my work in hospice. It was a good reminder for me right now.

So once I discovered that dragonflies are positive symbols, I liked them a little more. Then I found out that they eat mosquitoes!!! Woo hoo!! Bring on the dragonflies!!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Mirror Coincidence: Millennium Wheel

Two of my 319 Facebook friends who don't know each other and live on opposite sides of the country both posted pictures of the Millenium Wheel in London on June 12. I wouldn't go so far as to say this is a synchronicity, but maybe it is...maybe it's a sign I should be headed to London!

The Rosicrucians

I'm going off the map here a little bit to share my experience last night with a local Rosicrucian meeting. First of all, my knowledge of the Rosicrucians is limited. My grandmother was a very active member in the 1940s and later, but she died when I was 11 so I didn't get to hear much about it from her. My recent personal awakening has been quite life-changing and it has been difficult for me to share my experiences with people who are still swimming at the surface... So I felt I needed to develop more local relationships with like-minded people. The library down the street from me was the location for the meeting, it worked with my schedule and it was free... how could I not go? There was an awkward moment in the beginning for me when I man I just met wanted to hug me hello and I blocked him. I worried that I hadn't been there 5 minutes and had already offended someone! He was understanding and the group was amazing. How pleasant to be around others who are so full of love and joy! And how wonderful to be in a room with like-minded people. I am now beginning to understand that although each journey is a personal one, it doesn't hurt to have companions along the way.

Anyways, if you're not familiar with the Rosicrucians, you can learn more about them here:

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Mirror Synchronicity: God is watching (part II)

After the whole penny cross incident where I learned that God IS watching... I asked my dad for a penny cross so that I could write about it in my blog. My dad didn't have any more so I went online. Immediately, I came across crosspennyministries which sells the penny crosses. On the website, when you click on the link to learn how much it will cost, you will find this pop up, which, if you read it, reminds us that God is watching...

Walking in Circles: Labyrinth Style

Lately I have been fascinated with labyrinths. I want to build one in my backyard. This is an article I found on the blogosphere about the therapeutic value of Labyrinths.

Walking in Circles: Labyrinth Style

Saturday, May 22, 2010

God is watching

As you may see from previous posts, my aunt just passed away. My cousin, her oldest daughter, received a condolescences from a friend in England who also happens to be psychic. The friend mentioned that my aunt was buried with a cross. My cousin, JL said no - there was no cross. The psychic friend felt pretty strongly about it, so my cousin and the friend brainstormed and came to the conclusion that one of her nephews might have been praying the rosary.

My cousin told me the story about the conversation with the psychic and I relayed it to my dad. As I was telling him the story he suddenly he had a very guilty look on his face. DAD what did you do? I asked. He sheepishly admitted that he had put a tiny penny cross in the casket when no one was looking. I told him that he was BUSTED, and that GOD is always watching.

We all got a kick out of the idea that he got 'caught' slipping a cross into his baby sister's casket.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Required Reading: 7 Secrets of Synchronicity

Well, if you're reading this website it's because you have some kind of interest in synchronicities. I would be remiss if I did not shout from the rooftops in joy that Trish and Rob MacGregor's new book on synchronicities just came out:

I just got it in the mail yesterday and I can't wait to read it!

Monday, May 17, 2010

Mirror Synchronicity: Honor thy family

There are a lot of May birthdays in my family. My mother in law's birthday is May 2. My father in law's birthday is May 13 and my husband and I both have birthdays on May 15. My husband's sister was pregnant and due on May 13, which would be an honor for the grandchild to share a birthday with his grandfather. However, since my husband and I both have May 15 birthdays, we were hoping the baby would be a little 'late'. He sure was. May 13 came and went.

An inducement was scheduled for May 16. Why couldn't the doctor have made it May 15, I asked? (a bit selfishly). Well, no matter. We got the call on the morning of our birthday that my husband's sister was in labor. We send lots of positive 'push' energy.

Now here's the cute part... the baby was born on OUR birthday, but at 5:13 p.m... still honoring the grandfather after all!!

Friday, May 07, 2010

A new soul learns about time

This isn't really a synchronicity but rather an observation from the past two weeks. I did not know if it was day or night, what time it was or what day of the week it was. I have heard that is what heaven is like. I never understood how that could be possible to not have any sense of time until now.

And yes, as a social work grad student studying mental health issues, I do realize that some of these things I am saying might categorically put me into the DSM...but I can assure you, I have a grasp of time now. :)

A new soul experiences the other side

From the time my aunt was in the hospital I started sensing presence. I never could see shapes, but I would see movement and sparks and just KNOW that others were there. Several times, I would see something and not comment and then my cousin would comment and then my aunt also was looking in the same direction.

When my aunt was out of the hospital and back in an Alzheimer's facility, I sensed a very strong spirit in one place. My cousin sensed it too and we decided to close our eyes and meditate on it to see if we could tell who it was. Not more than 10 seconds later, my cousin laughs out loud. I hushed her and told her it takes me a little longer than that to check in and I continued to meditate. Well if you read my other post about the colors, you'll understand how I knew who it was. I opened my eyes and asked my cousin why she was laughing. She had experienced her first auditory message ever and it was our grandmother telling her to let me figure it out for myself. I did figure it out and it was my uncle's brother who passed several years ago. It made sense in hindsight and also was later confirmed because he was on a lot of people's thoughts.

One time I was trying to go to sleep and I heard like 5 people whispering to my aunt from the other side. Interestingly, one of them had a voice similar to one of my cousin's.

Another time when my cousin and I were trying to go to sleep we started getting freaked out by all of the movement. Even though we knew we were surrounded by loved ones, it was still startling. The door rattled a lot, among other things.

Ultimately, I acknowledge that one needs to be careful what one wishes for, because I did wish for this. It's comforting and unsettling at the same time. When people say you are never alone, they're right. You are NEVER alone.

A new soul experiences someone else's life review

The life review took place over two evenings that I was included in. The first night as I was trying to go to sleep, I saw the colors and then I saw an image of an amusement park ride that went in circles. It had vibrant colors. The following day, I asked my cousin if they ever went to amusement parks and she said yes, but that her mom did not like the roller coasters but rather the twirly rides. My cousin told me my aunt liked to giggle on the twirly rides.

I approached my uncle and mentioned the amusement park memory and it sparked for him a whole series of memories that he might not have recalled at that time on his own. They were happy memories and I think it was a gift for him to know she was reminiscing too.

The following night I saw a bunch of buildings, including the vision of the one house I recognized.

The saddest vision for me was my aunt and uncle's wedding day because I felt such sorrow that she had to go. It was as if I could feel her emotions and her love for him and her regret that she had to leave. I was bawling. She also showed me a picture of them with my mom and dad and mentioned that 'we're all here right now' which REALLY made me cry because my mom is on the other side.

On a lighter note, I also had a very vivid picture of guys and girls riding in a red convertible with the top down having quite a bit of fun... "up to no good" as I felt like describing it. Now remember, I have never had 'visions' before, so I wasn't quite sure if it was real or a dream, but I described it to my uncle. He got a big smile on his face and remembered a double date with his brother where they were all riding around in a red convertible, just like I had described. It was weird for me to report to him everything I saw, and I sensed it was unsettling a little bit to him as well, so we agreed that I would save any other memories for after my aunt passed.

A new soul takes a trip to the other side

This actually makes me laugh a little bit. When my aunt was in the hospital and I was meditating, I saw a doorway. In my head I got the message that The door is open, but there is no rush, take your time. What a pleasant vision!

Another time, I had my eyes closed and we went through all the colors and we went through the light and ended up in the room. We left the body and hung out at the ceiling for a bit and then returned to the body. Then we left the body and hung out a bit looking at the room down below. Then the room faded to white and I saw all of the people again. I felt her panic like No I'm not ready! and then I was immediately awakened.

A few days later, when my aunt was doing her life review (more on that later), I saw about 30-40 people in the backyard of her childhood home. They were patiently waiting on her. How peaceful and comforting that she was going to have such a big reception party!

Then a few hours or days later (time is really distorted over the past 2 weeks), I saw the same crowd in the backyard and they were all pulling up chairs. I heard the message and perhaps a soft sigh that said, This is going to take a while. I had no idea at that time how long "a while" would be.

A new soul experiences physical pain

This is the coolest and scariest ability I think. While my aunt was still in the hospital, I started to feel physically what she felt. Because she was late-stage Alzheimer's disease, she was unable to articulate when she was in pain. I felt all her symptoms. I didn't have to be in the room but could be down the hallway or in another city and I would know when she was hurting. I felt shortness of breath, lightheadnesses, heart pain, shoulder pain, numbness and tingling, choking... Very weird. My cousin and I worked out a system where if I wasn't present, I would text her with my physical pains and she would see if she could validate it. She was the only one who believed me, so telling anyone else was pointless. I remember lying in bed at my home two hours away and feeling a shoulder pain. Because this is new for me, I don't know sometimes whether it is me or whether it is her, but it was so random, I assumed it was her. I found out the next day that was the time where she was positioned uncomfortably on that side and my cousin was not surprised that she had been in pain.

This is where I began to worry what it would feel like when she died. As I write this, two weeks later, she has not passed yet.

A new soul experiences the colors

Praying by my aunt's bedside, I started to see swirling circles of color in my head. The colors were more vibrant than anything I have ever seen on this earth... I can't even explain them. I started to notice that as different people in the room talked to my aunt, the colors would change. I then noticed that the colors were relatively consistent with the people. My uncle was navy blue, my cousin Lynn, turquoise. Every time the grandchildren came in the room I saw little red hearts. The colors were so consistent that I could tell who was walking in the room even with my eyes closed. My cousin C. had green, but for her, I sensed it wasn't her color but rather her mother (who was dying) was trying to send her healing energy.

So now what? It still feels like a parlor trick. What do I do with this newfound knowledge?

A new soul has a new experience

Those of you who have followed my blog for a while know that I have not ever claimed to have any psychic abilities. At best, I would have described myself as empathetic. Well, something happened 2 weeks ago today and my crown chakra must have exploded open or something because I am now sensing and feeling things I have never felt before. I believe the catalyst was when a very dear aunt with end-stage Alzheimer's went to the E.R. in Cleveland. Almost from the first night I was there, this new sense of the world opened up.

The very first thing that happened was when I was sitting by her bedside with my eyes closed, I felt swaying as if I was on a boat. I found myself swaying back and forth, back and forth. I then felt drawn upward as if someone was pulling me up out of my body but then I would always come back down. The rocking continued. It was a rather strong feeling of not being in control, which was unsettling, but it was peaceful.

Mirror Synchronicity: Beyond the Sunset - Part II

When I was preparing for the conference I was talking about my research to a co-worker who was practicing hymns that she was going to play for a patient. I told her that "Beyond the Sunset" was the most common epitaph that I had found and that I discovered it was a hymn. She said she had never heard of it and went to her book to look it up. The page opened up to the Beyond the Sunset hymn.

If you would like to hear the tune, I've selected a Pat Boone version especially for you here:

Mirror Coincidence: Beyond the Sunset - Part 1

Last summer I sent a proposal to a conference for cemetery research that I was conducting. My research team collect epitaphs from local cemeteries to look for changes in attitudes towards death.
I had to submit my conference proposal before we had collected the data. I wanted a catchy title, so I called it "Beyond the Sunset: What the epitaphs Tell Us about Changing Attitudes Towards Death in the 20th Century."

Later when we finished our research, I learned that Beyond the Sunset was the most popular epitaph for all of the epitaphs we collected!

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Death education is a happy place

I recently had the great pleasure to attend the 32nd annual conference for the Association for Death Education and Counseling ( in Kansas City, MO. Having never attended this conference, I was not sure what to expect. I thought some people might be a bit 'goth' and perhaps morose with a lot of black. (I didn't think too hard on the matter). What I actually found was an amazing gathering of people willing to open their hearts and talk about the big stuff. To be clear, it wasn't all "serious" conversations - there was a lot of laughter too. Not surprisingly, there were quite a few synchronicities and serendipitous moments. But before I get into those, I wanted to talk about the general feeling of openness and try to share the experience.

Robert Neimeyer, for those of you who are not into Thanatology (the study of dying, death and bereavement) is one of the significant researchers in the field. As a graduate student, I recognized his name as one that I saw a lot in my studies. When I saw him at the opening reception, I asked him if he would take a picture with me for me to send to my advisor to goad my advisor about who I was "hanging out with" at the conference.

Because I did not know Professor Neimeyer personally, it was a big risk to walk right up to a top scholar and ask for a moment of his time. Well, he was so gracious and so polite and when we took the picture, he had a genuine smile - not a forced pose like most people do when asked to take a picture with someone they don't know. The person who was trying to use my phone to take the picture struggled a bit with the design of the camera phone (Google, please fix this!) and the moment extended into several as we had to keep trying...and then the lighting was bad, so we tried a different angle. Still, every picture had that genuine smile. (I would love to share, but when I took the picture I did not mention the internet, so in respect to him I shall leave it out...). Later on that evening and early the next day, we kept passing each other. Each time he smiled, genuinely. I felt special to be acknowledged by someone as important as him.

For the keynote address the following day, the main room filled up quickly and I was told there were open seats up in front. (Most like to sit in the back so they can get out of the room quickly). I ended up sitting in the very front row. There was one empty seat next to me in a very full conference room, and who should walk up and inquire, but Professor Neimeyer. Now, I had already randomly run into him 3 or 4 times in the past day in a conference of 600 people, so it was quite amusing to me. I told him, "I swear, I'm not stalking you!"

The keynote was amazing - one of the best I have ever seen. He made us laugh, he made us cry. His name is Thomas Lynch and he is a former funeral director, essayist and poet. I should be embarrassed to admit this, but I had not heard of him prior to this event, so it was even more surprising and delightful to have been so thoroughly entertained. But here's what also struck me. Sitting next to me, Professor Neimeyer laughed heartily. Several times when he laughed, he looked around to watch other people laughing too. It was like he took great pleasure in other people's laughter as well. Now you may have seen studies about how we laugh more in a group, yada, yada, yada, but this was different. He actively looked around and took in the laughter of others. He turned to me while he was laughing to see if I was laughing too. It was very unique to me and I pondered it for several days. What does it mean? Why does he do that? What does it say about him?

Over the course of several days in having additional connections with a wide variety of attendees, I talked about my experience and observations and I found out that others had similar stories -the feeling of connectedness. Granted, Professor Neimeyer has been going to this conference for years and is a former president, but so many people had the same type of experience - a meaningful (if brief) interaction with this man who is one of the TOP of his field. I even heard a story about him in a Conga line at a conference in the early '90s. Let me remind you, he is a top scholar on DEATH and DYING and he is this super friendly, open, warm person who laughs heartily.

And in thinking about this man, I realized that he personified for me the experience from the whole event. Those who study death and dying are, in the words of Thomas Lynch, "in the deep end of the pool." We were all connected. No one there has had an easy life. One doesn't just "happen" into the field of death and dying and grief and loss... we're there because we know loss. Intimately. But once one knows loss, you process it, you think about it, you accept it, you are free. You are light. It's there. You understand that you could lose your husband or your wife or your mother or your father, your child or your best friend tomorrow. You could even die yourself. So today is an opportunity, a gift. What do we do with this gift? Do we treasure it? Do we open it, share it, devour it, dance with it? Absolutely.

Thank you God for giving me today.

Saturday, March 06, 2010

Transitions: A child's question

Though I originally created this blog to talk about synchronicities, I have decided that I cannot pass up also sharing the stories I encounter related to my new position as a hospice social worker. It's touchy because my code of ethics requires complete confidentiality, therefore, I will have to limit the identities to only vague references. Still, these stories need to be told. Some will be death bed visions and others will be messages from beyond. I'm calling this new section "Transitions".

As told to me by an eyewitness:
Grandpa had a peaceful death. The whole family was there and just a day before he was able to give the thumbs up as if to say, "don't worry about me." The day after "grandpa" died, his 4 year old grandson asked, "So grandpa's in heaven now?" and his aunt said, "yes, grandpa is in heaven." The child then pointed to the corner and replied, "So why is he standing over there?"

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Mirror Synchronicity: Inspiring woman...

This past Friday I had an amazing day helping to make a 91 year old hospice patient's wish come true. She wanted to ski one last time. It was nothing short of a miracle how everything and everyone came together to make it happen and it couldn't have gone smoother.

Today, I was at Costco picking up my pictures and I was so excited about them and the clerk couldn't care less.

I turned to the couple next to me and showed them the picture and said, "Can you believe this woman is 91 years old?!" The woman replied, "Wait, what's her name? There can't be two 91 year old women that went skiing."
I told her the woman's name was Joan and she told me that her son is married to the daughter of Joan's cousin Cher who had gone on the trip with us. They had heard the whole story last night at dinner!

Sunday, January 03, 2010

Directional Synchronicity: A Time to Grieve

I am an intern at a hospice. When I was going through orientation, my boss gave me a copy of this book, telling me that they give it to any staff who have lost a family member. I looked through the book and thought that it would be very helpful for someone experiencing loss. I decided to order an extra one on Amazon just to have it as a gift for anyone who had lost someone. I ordered it used because it was described to be in good condition. It was sent via media mail and took weeks to arrive. The day it arrived, I was opening the package when my husband received a phone call that his grandmother died. It arrived at just the right time and I ended up giving it to my husband's aunt who was grieving the loss of her mother.

Mirror Synchronicity: It's a twin thing

My husband has sisters who are identical twins. Last fall, one of the twins moved to Okinawa. The other twin lives in North Carolina. They miss each other terribly and video chat almost every day. When I received Christmas cards from both of them, it turned out they had sent the exact same card. I had assumed that the one living in the U.S. had purchased extra cards for her sister. It turned out that was not the case. Out of the thousands of Christmas cards available, both sisters had picked out the exact same one individually.